Sexy Journey

This is a journal of my GM DIET.

I do not regularly weigh myself.  One, because I know what I look like.  Two, I know I am fat.  Three, I was scared.  On rare occasions that I am weighed,  it is usually in a clinic or in a hospital.  Therefore, no, I did not weigh myself before diving into the Program.

This journal will not be how much weight I lost because of the diet.  Instead, this is to keep tabs of my experiences during the 7 days of blissful suffering.

DAY 1:

All the fruits I care to eat, especially watermelons and muskmelons.  No cream or dressing. No coffee. No iced tea.  Here’s the problem, I am not a water-drinker.  The idea of drowning myself with 10 glasses of water everyday was like undergoing Chinese-water torture.  My liquid intake before today came as coffee (iced, blended or brewed), iced tea, Coke. So, having none of the latter and only lots of the former means caffeine-withdrawal headache.  Not the pounding, jackhammer type of headache, its more like a hangover headache.

I love watermelon and muskmelon (cantaloupe) shakes, with plenty of cream or milk, drizzled with chocolate syrup.  But just the fruits?  Not very appealing. I mixed it up with apples, pineapples, grapes, papaya, and mandarin oranges to make it interesting and edible.  It didn’t taste bad, but too sweet.  My throat began to ache like I was developing tonsillitis.

At lunchtime, I was very full, but not satisfied.  My system was looking for the usual sensations: the smell of cooking oil, the salty taste while chewing on pork chops, the burn as ice-cold Coke pass through my esophagus.  By 3pm, I was about to snap.  I miss my chips and coffee.  A good friend, bless her (so much) came to the rescue and bought me Japanese sweet corn (no butter, lightly salted).  The first bite was pure heaven.  Thank God that I had myself under control at 4:30pm, just in time for a meeting where the food served were pizza and coffee.  The sight and smell as the pizza box was opened was an assault! Congratulations to me for having resisted the temptation. My dear Stefan Salvatore, I’ll never pass judgment on your moment of weakness again.

Dinner at home was another test of strength.  The family had Pork Abodo de Cebu.  One of my favorite soul foods. While I, had my fruit mix, again.   More and more, it was becoming too difficult to swallow.  The pain on my throat and the headache are increasingly annoying.  I went to bed early.  A rarity considering I am an insomniac.

It wasn’t a restful sleep.  I am beginning to feel sore all over. From the dandruff to the ingrown, I felt like I have been beaten to a pulp or run over by a steamroller.  Every inch of me was tender to the touch.  Other times I could not feel my limbs, but when I try to move them, I ache.  If it wasn’t for the absence of the burning feeling, I swear I was transforming into a vampire!

DAY 2:

I woke up today sore and crabby.

Today is all veggies-day.  Breakfast was supposed to be baked potatoes patted with unsalted butter.  But I wanted to cheat.  I peeled 4 medium-sized potatoes, boiled them with salt, ground pepper, cinnamon, and curry powder.  When cooked, I drained the potatoes and mashed them.  I put in a tablespoon of garlic-flavored margarine.  Yum!  I finished it as fast as I could while it’s still hot.  There was nothing to chew anyway.

I packed 2 decent servings of garden salad (lettuce, cucumber sticks, carrot chips, singkamas (a.k.a. Mexican turnip) sticks).  I saw a bottle of Ceasar Salad dressing in the fridge and packed it too.

At around 10am, I was already hungry.  I took out one of my salads and prepped it with just a tablespoon of my contraband dressing.  On normal days, the salad would have been drenched. My conscience is creeping in on me.  There is still hangover headache and soreness, but manageable (or ignoreable).  I am now in better control of my body and my reactions to the program and to the temptations around me.

Lunch out with GM buddy Chessy, and two supportive friends at Grab-A-Crab Resto, Robinson Mall Branch .  We ordered Garlic Kangkong (water spinach sautéed in garlic) and Chop Suey.  The support friends are there to take-out the meat from the chopsuey, while Chessy and I feasted on the veggies. Surprisingly, I wasn’t salivating over the lemon-chicken right under my nose.  The test came much later when the pastries were brought out.  It took an effort to take my eyes off the dish and simply say, “I’ll come back for you next week.” Lunch was happy, fulfilling and satisfying.  With the coming of this happy feeling, the sores and aches went away.

Since I was no longer bothered with the sores and aches, I had a new concern to worry about.  With all the water that I have been drinking, I would have thought the volume  and frequency of my comfort room breaks would increase.  But that wasn’t the case, I felt sloshy. I discussed this with hubby.  His theory is that since I have not been a water person for so long, it will take some time to dilute and declog my system.  For whatever reason, we were just happy that I was no longer crabby.

I finished my second serving (the one I packed this morning) for dinner.   And went to bed.  It was a good day.

DAY 3:

Today is mixed fruits and veggies day.  I woke up peppy.

I prepared my fruit and veggie salad (watercress, lettuce, cucumber, carrots, pineapples, apples, grapes, oranges) to take to the office.  Encouraged that I was able to resist the pizza and pastry temptations, I was primed for today.

I was already hungry at around 10am.  I packed enough for a breakfast and lunch and was very excited  to try my version of a vinaigrette (extra virgin olive oil, apple cider vinegar,honey,  salt and pepper).   It smelled good and tastes good too.  It was better than cheating with a bottle of Ceasar Salad dressing like I did yesterday.  I actually enjoyed eating my “breakfast” with it.

After 4 glasses of water, the result of my comfort room break was, finally, what I expected.  And the frequency increased throughout the day, too.  My pee was very light colored and doesn’t smell.

At lunch, Chessy brought her own version of dressing as well.  Ripe mango puree with cane vinegar and sesame oil.   We shared lunch.  She brought some fruits and veggies that were not on my pack.  Some cubed ripe mangoes and  Mexican turnip (singkamas).  She also had some extra dipping, just in case.  Cane vinegar with minced garlic, lightly salted.  Hhhhmmmm….. I love this day.

I was so happily full that the smell of mid-afternoon coffee, crunching sound of chips  from my office mates didn’t bother me. I didn’t get affected that there was pizza, hot bread and ice cream delivered to the office.  I was not even resentful that I wasn’t allowed to eat any of those.

I was ecstatic to discover that I can go through the day without the things (or foods) I once thought I couldn’t  do without.

I joined the family for dinner.  I felt confident enough to be around them, eating their regular food, while I munched on my greens and yellows.  They had stir-fried veggies with pork.  My daughter asked me to taste the veggies on their menu to see if she did it right.  I took a very small bite, and surprisingly, the taste of cooking oil repulsed me!

One good thing about the diet is that it cured me of my insomnia.  I went to bed at around 10pm now rather than 2am.  I am not tired, just sleepy.

Tomorrow is going to be something else as I am not a banana-eater.  The milk I can handle.  To say that I am dreading Day 4 is an understatement.  But, considering how today had surprised me made me hopeful that it may not be as bad as I imagined it.

DAY 4:

Wrong!

It is as bad as I imagined it.  Worse even.

I woke up this morning hungry.  Unfortunately, was not able to stack on my menu the day before.  I had a lot of paper works and I went out late from the office.  With so much abundance of bananas everywhere, I was not able to pick a few before I got home.  Therefore, I came to the office today empty-handed.  I felt like a being a soldier going into battle without his ammos.  Brilliant move!

At 9am, I took a personal 30- minute time off to rush to the nearest grocer to buy the bananas and milk.  I was debating with myself, “Which/What milk?” Liquid or powder?  Skim, Non-fat, Full Cream, Low fat, Iron fortified, or calcium intensified? Jeez! I only need plain old simple milk. I am in a hurry!  I am hungry!

In the end, I settled for the old reliable Bear Brand Powdered Milk Swak pouch that cost me P20.  I only need to consume 3 glasses of milk today, why am I making a fuss?  I figured that if I am to eat 8 bananas today, I might as well have my milk hot.  Kill my taste buds and be done with it.

Went back to the office, made a mug of hot milk and began the banana ordeal.  OK, 1 banana down, 7 more to go!  All the while I was thinking, “Would it be OK to take some of these bananas to Frostbite and have them made into frozen fruit yogurt?”

A banana and half mug later, my stomach is not stinging anymore but I am far from satisfied.  My thoughts wandered into the GM Wonder Soup (Onions, Cabbage, and any other vegetable out there) which is supposed to be a supplement to today’s program.  “Sus, utan bisaya ra na! Naay daghan ana sa carenderia”  (It’s just  vegetable soup. We can buy that from the cafeteria.) Chessy and I decided to go to the cafeteria to grab some soup.  Alas, no such soup on their menu today!   We don’t want to have another banana for lunch.  We braved the drizzling rain to another near-by carenderia only to find that the soup already sold-out. But there was another vegetable soup dish available.  Perfect! The tips of my fingers were beginning to fell icy-cold from hunger, I am not about to get choosy.  To finish off the meal, I had 2 bananas.  Being too hungry will make a person rethink her preferences.

In the afternoon, I had 2 more bananas and a mug of hot milk.  All throughout, I was chanting, “Go the distance. Go the distance. Three more days.  Three more days. No pain, No gain (or loss, whichever.)” The lifesaver today was a small sachet of Jollibee Mayo that was in my bag.  It was there for God knows how long!  It was unopened and still good.  I know that ripe table bananas and mayo isn’t the best combination, but I’ll take anything just to take my mind off the banana taste!

Dinner was – – you guessed right, 2 more bananas (with decent mayo in a jar, this time) and another mug of hot milk.  I still have 1 more banana to go, but I don’t care about that anymore.  I just wanted to crawl into bed and wish the day over!

DAY 5:

Whoopi, feast day!  Today, I can have beef and tomatoes.  I woke up early, hungry yet hopeful.  I cut the beef and 8 whole fresh tomatoes into strips.  Sauteed some garlic and onions, added the tomatoes and the beef.  I let the tomato juices tenderize and cook the meat.  Seasoned it well. Sprinkled some sesame seeds and packed it for the office.  HA! I was feeling vengeful!

I could not deny the carnivore within me.  By 10am, I was devouring half of my ration.  At lunchtime, Chessy and I ordered Jollibee Burger Steaks (in mushroom sauce) and had it delivered right under our smug faces.  We kept the steaks and donated the rice to our officemates. I finished the Burger Steaks plus what was left of my ration.  I’ve never been more appreciative of red meat than today.  Hot tea with a squeeze of calamansi, completed our delightful meal.

It was a very good thing that I had a very satisfying lunch.  I was asked to emcee an Induction Party of the Metro Gensan Dental Chapter of the Philippine Dental Association tonight.  I was sure that there would be at least a single beef dish that will be served, I wasn’t sure though if it would be acceptable to my program.

It turned out that I need not worry whether the beef dish would be acceptable to the GM diet, because it did not have any.  By the time that I had a little time off the stage to eat, the beef dish was all gone. And no refill was to be expected!  Great!

The party ended a little before midnight.  As soon as I got home, I asked hubby to rush to the 24-hour Jollibee outlet and get me a Burger Steak.  Hey, I didn’t complain (much) about the too repetitive and identical foods I have to endure the last 4 days, I am not about to start complaining about 2 identical burger steaks in a day!

DAY 6:

Another beef day! This time, with veggies.  Its a weekend, so no Chessy buddy for lunch.  I’m on my own.

I promised to take the kids to Robinsons Mall to catch the Ironman 2 movie.  Sure,  no problem.  Plenty of options in the mall.

As it’s a weekend I stayed in bed longer than necessary.  But when the dreaded brownout came at around 10am, we started moving and getting ready for the mall.  When we got there, the kids wanted some Mr. Frosty and Potato Madness. At the fries stall, we bought regular sized fries in all the flavors, barbeque, sour cream and cheese.  I didn’t even blink.  My mouth didn’t water and my throat didn’t constrict with the longing of sampling it.  I settled for Beef Steak and Corn-on-the-Cob from the food concessionaires.  Damn, I wasn’t on my swimsuit. The steak’s sauce was so salty, it was like swimming in muddy seawater.

I can’t do it.  I can’t eat it, not another bite.  I tried to finish my corn and hurried to enter the theater. We immediately went home after the movies.  I cooked stir-fry veggies. While the kids enjoyed their usual greasy, salty……yummy Lechon Manok.

Today, didn’t turn out well.  In summary, I ate seawater-pickled beef and I had more veggies that meat!  Tomorrow is the last day. Regardless how today went I am still excited of the surprises tomorrow offers.

DAY 7:

Graduation Day!  It’s Brown Rice and Veggies Day.  Chessy and I planned fabulous graduation celebration with DokSi, Glenda and Mylaj;  A late lunch at Grab-A-Crab and then a Body Massage at the Red Tropical Spa.

I do not know how to cook brown rice.  I have never cooked brown rice before.  The instructions said to soak the rice for 30 minutes in 2:1 rice to water proportions.   That didn’t seem right.  But what do I know?  I religiously followed every letter.

After 30 minutes, I drained the rice and just went with my instincts. Placed the rice in a Pyrex Vision Pot and added 2 cups water.  Cooked it over medium heat at stove top. When that’s done, I stir-fried carrots, sayote, cauliflowers using  extra virgin olive oil.  I seasoned it very lightly with fine iodized-salt and black pepper powder.  Amazingly, my taste buds agreed with the organic taste and smell of the brown rice.  It really went well with the veggies too.

I left early for our late lunch date.  Went to Hairzone to have my nails done, a little pre-graduation reward to self.  At lunch we had Garlic Kangkong,  Mix Seafood Veggies, Carrot juice and Watermelon Shake (no milk/cream).  I am in love with brown rice.  I am thinking of all the things I can cook that’s perfect with it…. Seafood Paella,  Mushroom Veggies, Cream of Asparagus.

It was a happy meal.  We had a few laughs on how we smuggled our pack brown rice to the restaurant, about the last week’s ordeals, and how we can’t wait to do it over again!  Call us crazy!  Despite the strain and constraints of the program, we were happy!

We topped our celebration with a good steam bath and professional massage at our favorite Red Tropical Spa. Any toxin we have not peed off during the week was surely sweat off by now.  I feel so clean and light.

The valuable lessons Chessy and I learned, even if we don’t lose too much weight, were [1] we learned to understand and control our bodies better; [2] we discovered the power of inner strength, such that our will is stronger than our food cravings; and [3]  healthy and sensible eating can be enjoyable.

Blissful Suffering

I am now on Day 1 of the GM Weight Loss Program.

I have never been on a diet before.  Even when my Internist and OB-Gyne advised that I should.

My  concept of a weight loss diet was “masochism.” For me, for the longest time, diets are superfluous and ostentatious designed for people with low self-esteem who depends on physical attributes for strength.  HOW WRONG I WAS!

As I aged, having gone through three major surgeries (1 appendectomy and 2 CS child births) and a moderate smoker, I experienced difficulties that I will not admit out loud.  I am easily out of breath, just tying my hair into a ponytail is an effort.  I get exhausted trying to dress up in the morning, especially when I try on several clothes before settling for the maternity-look.  My clothes mostly are purchased from “plus-size” shops or sections of department stores.  The entire size of those trendy ones could fit only one of my thighs.

But I am smart, and pretty, and happy with my family.  I have friends and a career.  Who needs to be sexy?

That was my excuse.

While the things that I am blessed with and thankful for are still true, I was no longer content with my over-all appearance.  This perhaps was my greatest motivation in looking at dieting in another light.

I want to feel good about myself.

So, I am off to a better, healthier me.  It is going to be the hardest seven days of my life, because I will be battling against myself.  I know my will is  stronger than my cravings.  My reasons are more than skin deep.  Yes, I’m going to be suffering.  But, it’s only going to be for a short while. And the blissful results will be worth the battle.